If you’re like most of my readers, you are realistic about the many transitions that occur in life. You are willing to engage them in a way that is intentional and want to move through them as challenging as it might be.
Some of the most difficult transitions involve terminal illness like living with cancer, end of life considerations, grief following a loss, and stepping into a new life after a big loss.
You hope that, at the end of it all, you’ll be able to transition back into life, fully engaged, believing that there are many good things ahead to discover.
But maybe you feel that something keeps getting in your way. Perhaps there are those around you who respond differently to your loss, and these individuals are influencing your journey or holding you back.
Maybe you feel like this reader:
“I feel stuck. No matter what steps I take, it feels like I’m dragging others behind me. It feels like I am taking some important steps but the weight of those around me is keeping me from moving forward.”
Or perhaps this reader’s experience resonates with you:
“As soon as I make a change, some people think it’s too fast. Others question my decisions and the way I engage life now. I don’t feel like people understand what I need. It makes me wonder if I’m doing life the ‘right way’ or if there is something missing that I need to know. I keep second-guessing myself.”
Does This Sound Like You?
Be honest – when loss comes, do you:
- Feel like life is forward quickly and you don’t know how to catch up to it?
- Fear that those around you are moving in a direction and it doesn’t make sense to you?
- Worry about the negative impact that your loss is having on those closest to you?
If so, you’re not alone. All of us have felt this way.
I Understand That Feeling All Too Well
I understand what it feels like to be in transition and wonder if you are doing everything possible to make the journey easier. I also know what it’s like to see others struggling with loss – a struggle that has resulted in unhealthy consequences.
Transition by its very nature is a new experience. So how do you know if you are doing it well?
That was my question when I learned that my wife who was 42 years old age was diagnosed with cancer and that our family of six (four children) now had to figure out what to do next.
Here’s what I discovered, and what I want to help you discover too:
Each person transitions in their own way, unique to them.
But how do we discover those unique features?
Our personalities, likes and dislikes affect our grief journey in a big way. That’s where my work comes in. By looking at specific traits in your personality, I can help you discover your unique loss profile and enable you to identify another person’s profile as well. What do I mean by that? Everyone needs to feel understood and understand others, especially when they are going through grief, trauma or transition.
Once you discover what makes you unique as you transition through loss, you will be transformed. Empathy, respect, and understanding begin to unfold both in you and in others and lighten the load that you are carrying. It’s much more than learning to tolerate another’s point of view; it’s about coming along side and entering into another’s experience while examining your own journey as well.
Loss, as difficult it is, does not have to stop you in your tracks. Nor does it have to wound you forever. There may be a few scars, but you will begin to heal. And better yet, you move through to the other side of loss alongside those who are important and close to you. You have taken the time to understand each person’s unique transitional loss preferences.
My Goal in Writing This Blog
Through my blog and podcast series, my mission is to give you the clarity, courage, and insight to engage your loss in a manner that is unique to you. And to give you tools to help you understand those closet to you, whether it be your family members, friends or co-workers.
From practical tools to help you transition in life; to strategies to help you personally grow; to information to help you understand others others who are going through loss, I will help you engage people in a way that is healthy, effective and empathetic.